Lots of thinking about this blog the last few days. At first I thought about how easy this part is for me because of how emotional of a person I am. BUT after further delving I decided this could be the hardest part for me, because its not just the EMOTIONAL part, its the BALANCE, and the "art" of being able to control or suppress emotion both inward and outward.
I am sure EVERYONE has had a time with there horse where they were so frustrated, mad, exhilarated, thrilled or just plain bored.... think back to one of those times. How did your horse react? I have noticed that the more frustrated or upset I get with a horse, the worse our relationship gets during that time. Last week I was doing some eye contact games with Indy, I was getting so frustrated because she would not give me her eyes or her ears and I just couldn't understand why not! I had treats, I had technique, I had the mental picture, but she just wouldn't do it!! So, out of frustration I started to play taking territory, every time she did not give me her eyes, I forced her to move away from me. HUGE MISTAKE! Indy had no idea what I was asking of her, it was almost as if giving me her eyes and ears was just too simple and there had to be something more. I walked away from her and tried to chill out, I let her much hay and I sat on a barrel and thought about what I was doing. I thought about my emotions, what I was feeling... then it hit me. How selfish of me!! I was not considering my horse! Indy is a high level 3 lower level 4 horse, but this was all new to her, she was confused and I am sure just as frustrated with me as I was with her. So, I decided to break it down. I broke down the game into smaller games, and BINGO! Each win was a step up, and finally, we had reached the top!!! The start of the day I could not keep Indy's attention, and by the end of the hour I had her doing 360's and companion walking around the round pen with me!!!
I am the type of person who blows up... it doesn't happen a lot but if my emotions become so out of control, I tend to freak. That happens with horses too doesn't it? Some people would call that a right brain quality. To me, its just unbalanced emotion, something I always have and always will struggle with. The past few years I have met some amazing women who have such control over their emotions that to be, it looks like an art. I am getting better, horses have helped me, people have helped me, and believe it or not, I am beginning to help myself. Emotional balance is something that does not come easy, and when it happens, the results are amazing. Don't hide behind a mask (horses don't), keep your emotions on your sleeve (horses do) but make sure they are appropriate (be a mirror to your horse), realize why you are feeling the way you do and what you can do to change it.
Remember, your horse is a mirror of you, they reflect you... who are you? Who do you want to be? What kind of relationship do you want with your horse? Become a person YOU can look up to and your horse can follow.
-e
Ahhhh okay it makes more sense now.
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